The Big Picture and The Crooked Path
- jimhlifecoach
- Aug 22
- 17 min read
Be Who You Must, That's a Part of the Plan - Part of the Plan - Dan Fogelberg
Sit back, relax, open your mind and consider this. You are part of a bigger plan. The Big Picture. You matter. You are here for a reason, and we all have a mission to accomplish. Viktor Frankl, in his book Man’s Search for Meaning, states that everyone has their own specific vocation or mission in life, to carry out a concrete assignment which demands fulfillment. They cannot be replaced, nor can their lives be repeated. Everyone’s task is unique, as well as their specific opportunity to implement that task.
Frankl goes on to say that we should not ask what the meaning of our lives are, but that
it is we who are being asked. Each of us is being questioned by life, and we can only answer to life by answering for our own lives. We can only respond by being responsible for our own lives.
The idea that each of us is being questioned by life suggests that life itself poses deep, personal, and often unavoidable challenges or calls to each of us. Rather than us asking, “What is the meaning of life?”, life turns the question around and asks us questions like... What will you do with your time here? How will you respond to the obstacles, twists, and turns? How will you live your life? How will you treat others? How will you grow, change, and rise after falling?
Life demands something from us. We are not simply passive observers. We are active participants, and our responses to life’s circumstances reveal who we are and shape who we become. Life continually questions us. Not with words, but with moments, choices, and challenges. Our task is to answer, not just with thoughts or beliefs, but with how we live.
How, Then, Shall We Live?
According to Wayne Muller, author of the book “How, Then, Shall We Live?” four simple questions have shaped the spiritual journeys of seekers for thousands of years. They call forth the very nature of who we are and how we live our brief time here on earth. And many of us, distracted by the rush and pressure of our lives manage to suppress or ignore these very fundamental questions. The questions are... Who am I? What do I love? How shall I live, knowing that I will die? and... What is my gift to the Family of the Earth?
Considering these and other questions that life is asking us requires us to step back from the details, distractions, and pressures of daily life. We need to consider the broader and deeper truths that give life its ultimate direction, meaning, and purpose. And more specifically our own lives. Where do we fit in, and how then shall we live? What is all of this for? Where is this heading? And, what truly matters in the end?
I understand that this can be a mind-blowing topic for many of us. The idea that life is
asking something of us can feel just like another demand that is being placed on us in our lives that may already be overwhelming. A demand that we can’t even wrap our minds around given everything else that screams for our attention in our daily lives. We don’t want to be asked. We want to be told. We want the short-cut. We want the answers. Some of us just want to be left alone. But the fact remains that no one is going to do that work for you. No one is coming to save you.
What life is asking of us is one of the most fundamental tasks that we must address as we follow our paths. And the fact that so many of us are oblivious to what life is asking of us goes a long way in explaining, and sometimes is the exact reason, why we get off course, why we get stuck, why we encounter obstacles that defeat us, why we settle, and why we give up.
We want answers. Relating my own experience, that I first described in my book Along the Crooked Path, when as an adolescent, after experiencing a day of disappointment, being bullied at school, hearing arguing, and experiencing storms within my own home... Upset and distraught, I called out, “Why are people so mean to each other? Why can’t people be kinder? How hard can that be?” There was no one with me. There was no one within earshot. No one who could hear me. Except... Let’s call it for now... Life itself.
It was some time after that I realized it was not me asking life those questions. It was life asking me. And for a moment in time, I felt peace. I felt determined. I felt empowered. I felt responsible even while at the same time feeling confused. I felt empowered but still with no answers or no ideas. Just feeling like it was my responsibility to figure it out. Life was telling me to wake up from my self-pity and go out and get answers. That was the start of me moving forward on my path seeking answers to what life was asking of me. And it all started with that awakening.
Our Paths Are Healing Journeys
They are journeys of personal growth where we are constantly being tasked with leveling up. We cannot stay where we are and remain how we are and expect things to be any different in our lives. The oft used quote of Albert Einstein is that “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.” We are responsible for the change in our lives. The change we wish to see, and in navigating the change all around us. And that requires us to change. To take responsibility, break old patterns, see things differently, to lean into discomfort and not avoid it, face our fears, and basically learn and grow. Leveling up requires rising higher. You are not staying the same, and certainly you are not leveling down. You are not the past versions of you. You are moving towards the highest version of yourself. And most of us have no idea who or what that is. But life is asking us to find out.
That approach and that mindset will get you started. But how do you keep going? It comes back to our responsibility for our paths, and the need for us to own our paths. We are not dependent. We are independent and responsible for our own lives. We are responsible for our choices and our actions, and we have the freedom to choose. But our independence only goes so far, as we realize that we live in an interdependent world. We have to be skilled at navigating our paths given that interdependence. Surely knowing where we fit in in relation to everyone and everything else would help us. Right? You would think that would at least give us a starting point or a foundation for what comes next. Come on Life. Show us some clues. Throw us some crumbs.
When you consider yourself in regard to the big picture, it brings many questions and
considerations to mind. Not only... Why am I here? But... Am I in alignment with my values, and how does that relate to everyone else? What are my values? Again... How do I fit in, and where do I fit in? How do we all get along, and not only stay out of each other’s way... How do we stay out of our own way? How do we show up? Is my ladder leaning against the right wall?
You cannot avoid the spiritual or existential questions that arise. The idea that there is a “Big Picture"... That there is a bigger plan and we all are part of that. And that begs the question, who created this plan? And, who decided what my role is? It brings into play the idea of a creator. A creator of something that is bigger than us all that is leading and guiding us. And not only did the creator create the plan, but the creator created us.
Another mind-blowing idea for some of us. I realize that. And that may turn some of you off because for some that smacks of religion. But before I lose you, let me tell you that I get it. I understand what even the hint of religion can do to some people. Many people are turned off by religion due to various factors, such as their own negative experiences with certain churches and teachings. People find certain doctrines to be outdated or harmful. Others have experienced judgement, trauma, or abuse within their faiths while growing up. And some people simply feel that their personal values or intellectual pursuits cause them to question and even reject any religious dogma.
There are all kinds of experiences and stories that people have of religious trauma or abuse that they have experienced or witnessed. There are examples of hypocrisy, corruption, and scandal within religious institutions that erode trust and have led to disillusionment. Some teachings are seen as negative, harmful, and out of date. And for some they feel that the religious explanations for the suffering and adversity in the world are insufficient and not helpful, therefore they turn away and look for answers elsewhere.
Losing My Religion
There are evolving beliefs, intellectual dissent, shifting values, and personal growth that lead people to question or abandon their faith. People develop their own understanding of the world, and they outgrow any religious beliefs that they may have had. The rise of secularism and humanism as alternative worldviews provide individuals with a framework for ethical and moral living that does not rely on religious beliefs. Some people just feel a lack of personal connection to religious traditions or rituals, leading some to explore spirituality or meaning in other ways.
In the song “Teach Your Children” by Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young, there is the line - You that are on the road, must have a code that you can live by. And so become yourself because the past is just a goodbye. Let’s take a closer look at this...
This lyric addresses people who are on a journey. Those who are on the road. Not just traveling, but those who are figuring out their place in the world. Navigating their paths. It could be referring to someone leaving home, stepping into adulthood, or transitioning through any other phase in their lives. It is a metaphor for anyone on their paths and on their personal growth journey.
And you that are on the road must have a code that you can live by. This speaks to the
importance of values. Having a personal code. Having a set of principles or beliefs that guide your actions and decisions. How, then, shall you live? Without that inner guidance... That inner compass... You risk being lost or living inauthentically. Getting stuck or off track. Climbing wrong ladders. It is a call to live with integrity and intentionality, rather than drifting aimlessly or following the crowd.
And so become yourself... Our journeys are about authenticity and self-discovery. The message is that by living by your code you grow into who you truly are. It is not about becoming who others expect you to be. It is about discovering and becoming your true self.
The past is just a goodbye. Let go of the past. Don’t let your past define you. That is not who you are. The past may have shaped you, but it is over. You are not bound to it. You are free to create a new path forward.
This song has been particularly significant to me, as I have been on my own journey, in so many ways. This lyric so perfectly summarizes our task in life. What Life is asking of us. Who are you? What do you value? Where are you going? What is your true self? And more specifically, what is your soul? For your true self really is your soul.
Your Soul Is Who You Are at the Deepest Level
To me the question has become not what life is asking of me, but what is God asking of me. You can call it God, the Universe, Source, Higher Power... But the idea is that we are divinely guided and divinely protected by something bigger than ourselves. We are being called towards our true selves. Seeking alignment with our true selves, our soul, and our True North. But what is true self? What is my soul? And how do I get in alignment with it? And how can I make a meaningful impact with my time and talents in the limited time that I have to spend on this rock flying through the galaxy that we call Earth.
There is something out there that is bigger than us all, and we are part of it
In his poem, “O Me! O Life!”, Walt Whitman states in relation to life, “That the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse.” My interpretation of that is that if life is a play, there must be a playwright. And in that play, we each have a verse to contribute. A role to play. Someone has written the play, someone has created the roles, and someone has filled those roles with each and every one of us.
We all have a still small voice inside of us that whispers to us, and I believe that is God. But again, you call it what you want. A more secular term would be your intuition. Your gut feeling. Really, it is your soul. But the voice whispers to us. And when someone whispers it is often not clear. It is difficult to hear or decipher. We often don’t notice it. It is drowned out by all of the noise or by our own egos. By conflicting “voices” in our heads. It may be buried and dormant. But it is there. And to move forward on our paths effectively we must dig it out. We need to decipher it from everything else going on in our heads. We need to listen to it and we need to figure out what it is saying.
We are all on healing journeys, and one of the most beautiful relationships is the one
between your intuition and your healing. When you are open to your intuitive abilities... When you are open to your soul... Your intuitive abilities will instantly illuminate everything that needs to heal within you. Things will be brought to the surface so that you can truly see them and have the choice to heal them. You are being called to activate your intuitive gifts. You have everything inside of you that you need to move forward and become the highest version of yourself. That person already exists out on your path. That person already exists inside of you. You need to get in alignment with that version of you.
But you have to clear your energy. The misaligned energy. The toxic energy. You need to get rid of the old and get grounded and embody the energy that will move you forward. And to do that you have to connect with your intuition. You need to connect with your spirit guides and to your soul You need to connect with God. With source. As you do that, you will see signs. Not answers, but clues. Guidance along your path in various forms. And you will begin to manifest so much more in your life in an increasingly powerful, potent and energetic way. We are called and pulled to activate our intuition, and then to work with it in a way that creates so much more peace, connection, and clarity as we move forward. This is what we are all called to do.
Your intuition is always online and within you. The signal is just buried. It is buried under all of our conditioning that has to do with our sense of safety, our relationship with our emotions, to power, to truth, to inspiration, and to spiritual guidance. You need to unlock your intuition and bring it into the light. Discovering and being guided by your intuition, listening to that still small voice, and being divinely guided requires three things. First of all, you have to be willing to lean in and explore the unknown. This may be new to you. How do you recognize it? What is it trying to tell me? And you have to be willing to get it wrong, and then try again. Secondly, you have to deeply trust yourself. You have to trust the signals that you are getting. Even if they are the total opposite to what you would normally do. And finally, you have to be responsible. You understand that when you receive intuitive information, you are responsible for the choices you make based on it. See if you can become more willing and more trusting of yourself, and more responsible for your choices, and then you will learn to recognize, trust, and get in alignment with your inner guidance.
Your Soul, or Your True Self, and Your Purpose Are Interconnected
There is a direct relationship between your soul and everything else in your life. There is a connection between your soul and your joy, your relationships, your friendships, your health and well-being, your path, and your purpose. There is evidence of this everywhere.
We may give a lot of attention to our health, relationships, and other things, but how many of us pay attention to the condition of our soul? We spend so much time swiping at the symptoms of our problems without addressing the root cause. And often the cause of so many of our problems on our paths is because we are not in touch with our soul. When was the last time that you went to the doctor because of issues you have been facing, and your doctor asked how your soul was?
Our soul is our truest identity, our true self, and I believe it is God’s blueprint that He placed
placed in us. It is what makes us unique. But so many of our souls are buried. They get burdened and pushed down by all the narratives that have been handed to us about ourselves. The narratives that haunt us and tell us we not worthy. That tell us we will never achieve our dreams. Your soul is your essence, and it needs to be awakened. It is waiting to be awakened. The more in touch you are with your soul, the clearer your path will be. It frees you.
Many of us know what it is like to be burdened by our past. The trauma, the shame and the failures. Many of us discredit how our paths have shaped us. Thinking that it is what it is, and we are unaware or do not accept how what we have been through holds us back or gets us off course. We think we are fine. We know it all, even though there is evidence to the contrary. That is our ego speaking. We bury our past.
But there are points in our lives where we are at crossroads. And those are windows of opportunity where we have the choice to level up. To awaken. To realize that what our past is telling us is a lie. It is not who we are. That deep down we have a dream that has been placed in our hearts that was put there by the Creator, and that we have been wired for purpose. Our purpose calls to us but we cannot hear it.
If your soul is buried, restless, or conflicted, it is very difficult to enjoy any success. It becomes much harder. It leads to apathy, settling, and not knowing what to do or where to go. It leads to ignorance. Leaving us without direction in our lives. We blow things off. Saying that it is what it is... Whatever... We really can’t enjoy our blessings to the fullest. We don’t appreciate them. We can’t enjoy our deepest relationships or connections with our partners, children, friends, and others if our souls are conflicted and restless.
Everything That You Need to Move Forward on Your Path is Already Inside of You
So where can we turn to actually get moving forward towards our desires and a fulfilling life given the burdens that we have been carrying and the issues that we face. I have stated all along that everything that you need is already inside of you to get you to where you are meant to be. And those things have been placed there by the Creator... Source... the Universe... God.
We are handed narratives through our life experience. We were not born burdened, ashamed, stressed, or unworthy. We were told those things as we grew. We were handed those things. We were not created to be that way. We need to see ourselves through the lens of the Creator. We were not made imperfect. We were made perfect for the role we are to play in the Big Picture of Life. We were not created to fail. We were created to succeed and to flourish. When you believe that... When you feel that... It shifts you.
There is a reality beyond the cultural moment that we are living in. And we can trust that the Creator is above whatever is going on around us in society, in our cities, our country, and the world. And that we are divinely guided and protected. A requirement, however, is that we open our minds and our hearts to this. That is how you allow it all in. Knowing that we have everything that we need inside of us, and that we are here for a reason empowers us. We can do the hard and brave things. Stepping outside of our comfort zones with faith. We face our fears. We replace fear with faith and move forward seeking alignment. Knowing that faith can do what fear cannot and never could.
But there are also forces working against us. The forces of the world and the negative
stories. The challenges and disappointments. There are forces that don’t want our souls to awaken. But when you know who you are and are aligned with your soul, those things cannot stop or defeat you. We need to be calm in the midst of the storms of life. We need to cling to the truth that we are all here for a reason and we have a divine purpose. We are not here to be defeated. We need to hold onto that. We need to claim that for ourselves. That is the greatest task we have. That belief frees us. You don’t have anything to prove to anyone. You have already been approved, and you can walk in that freedom. And that will shape who you are, how you love others, and how you see the world, and your role in it.
We are all on spiritual journeys, and you don’t have to be part of, belong to, or adhere to a particular religion or faith to be on that path. It is a personal and individual experience, and it is freeing not being part of a structured and ritualized system that may be unrelatable. Having said that, some structure and coming together in community can be beneficial to us on our journeys as we support each other, seek guidance, and share our stories. But in my opinion, the best system of religion is not one that controls, judges, or condemns. But one that frees, uplifts, loves, and is inclusive to all. One that encourages us all on our own personal journey.
Churches were built by humans. Religions were created by humans. But humans were created by God... Source... the Universe. Human-made systems may or may not reflect the essence of the divine connection you feel. You can recognize that institutions like churches and religions are shaped by human interpretation, organization, and culture—while still affirming the divine origin of humanity. Each of us is divinely created, and that truth can ground a personal, authentic relationship with the Creator.
And It Makes Me Wonder - from Stairway to Heaven by Led Zeppelin
This may seem like a lot to understand, believe, and accept. The idea of someone or something greater than us all... A Big Picture and our unique role in it, and the idea of a Creator who is responsible for it all. You may think that it is easier to believe that everything is random. That we make our own rules and govern ourselves. We decide what is right and wrong. That we are all competing with each other. That we can do what we want, often with no regard to the effects on other people, the environment, and anything else external to us.
But what does an approach like that get you? How are you and how have you been physically? How are your relationships? How is your personal growth? How is your soul? Are you where you want to be? Have you settled? Are you limiting your potential? How many broken relationships have you had along the way? What are you contributing outside of yourself? Are you truly happy and fulfilled? What will be the legacy that you leave? What regrets will you have in your final days? These are just some of the questions that we need to honestly ask ourselves.
How would the knowledge of there being a Creator with a perfect plan and a perfect role for you to play in that plan... A Creator who is ever-present, leading and guiding you, and who never leaves you... Who protects you and gives you a bright hope for the future... How would even knowing one of these things shift your perspective as you follow your path?
Where do you wander off and look for help? Do you do a quick google search? Do you
check out Social Media Influencers who give the answers to our problems in thirty second reels? Do you turn to Amazon Prime who will deliver that perfect solution next day? Do you turn to ChatGPT which will give you answers right away? We chase fixes and follow formulas, and it is so easy to fill the silence or the longing hoping that something.... Anything... Will help.
We look externally, when we really need to look inward. Lean not on your own understanding, for our own hearts can deceive us. Our understanding only sees a small part of the big picture. Our emotions shift from day to day. Without being anchored... Without having our eyes on finding our True North and aligning that with our soul and our truest self, life becomes a crapshoot. A roll of the dice. And it may feel like you are winning at times, but at what cost? And what are you missing and what have you lost along the way?
When things are not going the way that you had planned, that is because there is a better plan. And it is when we embrace that completely, that another plan can set in. Because when we are trying to control something, or we try to make it the way that we want it, then we stay in a resistant energy. And in that resistance, we block the miracle. We block the universal energy and the flow, and the order and the creativity and the co-creation. The more that you trust, the more that you will receive.
Carl Jung is quoted as saying, “The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.” So many people spend their whole lives trying to be what others or society expects them to be. Which is why at a certain point, the real work becomes shredding the lies and masks, and remembering who you were before the world told you who to be. Remembering who you were created to be.
This is the path to inner liberation, and it is never too late to begin and consider the Big Picture, your role, and where you fit... Along The Crooked Path.
Learning Opportunity - Try this exercise -
AfterNotes 2 - Led Zeppelin - Stairway To Heaven (Official Audio)
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